Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Should I stay or should I go now?

So, I have free tickets to the SING program at Baylor tomorrow night. SING, from what I understand, is a production by different sororities and fraternities on campus, in which they put on a 7-8 minute broadway type skit based on a theme. Anyway, it sounded like fun, so Stanton and I have been planning on going for like a month. This would also be the first evening we left Chaselyn for the evening. MaryAnn and Chris were so gracious to offer their services, but now I'm having second thoughts...

Since its on a weeknight, I would only get to see Chaselyn for a little bit in the morning, a little in the afternoon when we picked her up, and then a little before bed time. So in my mind its like a whole day without her. The closer it gets, the more I'm chickening out. I just love her so much, I would rather do something on the weekend where I can spend all day with her and then just a couple hours out with Stanton. To add to my distress, Chaselyn has a little cold and I just feel its my job to take care of her.

Oh, the craziness of motherhood. I never would have imagined that my life would be so impacted by another person that I would consider missing a long awaited date night with my hubby. I've always been quite self-centered and not very empathetic (it's ok, the first step is admitting you have a problem), but Chaselyn has changed that. I am grateful that I have become a little less selfish, this was one of my big fears during pregnancy. But now I'm wondering if I'm taking it too far. I don't have to decide until tomorrow, but as I sit here and type with my sweet angel coughing and wheezing while she sleeps, I can't imagine not being there if she needs me.
















Right now, I'm guessing I'll be sitting here at about this time tomorrow night writing some more and being around just in case ;)

5 comments:

  1. I love the new blog!! I think you'll really enjoy it, especially years down the road. I started mine while we were engaged and it's fun to read some of the ridiculous pre-wedding stories.

    Sidenote: Thanks for the recent blog comments! :)

    This post made me so happy. One of my biggest fears of having a child is my selfish nature. I constantly tell Michael that I'm terrified I'll resent our child for taking up so much time. But it's great to see that you were somewhat similar and she's totally changed you. Breathe of fresh air.

    Wow, longest blog comment ever. I look forward to reading many more entries from Dr. Greer!

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  2. So I think I may try this out after seeing your new blog. How do you like it? Can you post pictures and albums?

    Bo and I are in the same situation. I think we left Jonas once since he was born, and that was AFTER we gave him a bath and put him to bed. We still have yet to venture out. Maybe one day ;)

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  3. Hey Meredith! I thought the blog would be good as a journaling type exercise for me. I'm not good at doing it on paper, so maybe I can do it on here. I've never been good about writing everyday in a journal either, so then all my entries are filled with catch up info and I never get to the real heart of what its like. I figure if I can write a short bit here most everyday, one day Chaselyn will have a better idea of what it was like for me when she was little.

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  4. JoNanna!! I think the blog is going to be a good way to keep up with life. With FB it was just a whole bunch of one liner statuses. Here I can really get something substantial down. I think that there is an application that allows you to make a picture slideshow, but I'm not real sure how it works. Thats one of my next tasks. Its real easy to post a picture within a post though. I'm going to try to get a picture a day on here.

    Hope all is well!!

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  5. Well, I'll try to get everything together. I hope to have time this weekend to figure this out! ;)

    Hope all is well with you! Peace out! :)

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